A few weeks ago, sitting on a hot parking lot, we watched my daughter "graduate" from preschool. Basically, she walked up and hugged her teacher in a cap and gown while we cheered her on. But still ... it was a symbol of ending one part of life and moving on to something new. That something new is Kindergarten. Just a few more weeks and she'll be there. She's excited to be at school "with Daddy." He teaches in the high school at the private school she'll be attending, but she knows he'll be nearby. But she's nervous, too, because this is something new and different, and in a lot of ways, she's like her daddy and has to stand back and adjust for a while before she can fully embrace something unknown, even if it is exciting and something she'll love. And how do I feel about all this? I prayed for this child, yearning and begging God for a baby, for six and a half years before He finally gave us a "yes." Of course, things haven't been as golden and wonderful as I expected when wishing for motherhood, but I wouldn't go back for anything. This child is the answer to prayers. She's smart and creative and sassy and girly and loves big.
And I know a lot of moms cry on the first day their child goes to Kindergarten, but I don't expect to in spite of this emotionally crazy history. Because I've done what I can to make sure she's prepared (including ordering special pencils from Amazon and scouring two different Walmarts for a particular composition book and buying uniforms). I know she's ready. And I know she's going to do great. What bothers me is that with this milestone, it means we only have about thirteen years more to finish preparing her to really leave the nest, to go out somewhere where she won't have mom and dad right there to turn her away from evil or remind her of good, to make sure she eats and does laundry and hangs out with the best people and attends worship services and and and ... You get my point. Time that seemed to stretch forever when she was born is flying by at lightspeed. Am I doing enough? I pray I am. And I know a lot of you are in the same boat. Do you find it hard to trust God with the biggest gift He's given into your care? Do you have to remind yourself that in reality you're only borrowing these precious souls for a time before you have to give them back? It's hard, but it's worth it. Trust and pray. And just keep raising them to go, and to go with God.
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This is a place for me to share thoughts and ideas not just related to writing. Thoughts about what's going on in my life, about an idea I got that I thought shareworthy, or just a funny anecdote.
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